Find sex via dating app: 8 simple steps for women
Some single woman are perfectly happy to remain single. This might be for career reasons or simply because her last partnership ended just a short time ago. However, this doesn’t mean that their sexual desires hit a wall. There are plenty of women looking for no-strings-attached adventures.
But how can a woman have fun without making any commitments?
All you have to do is sign up on dating apps that are geared for casual sex. No dating sites for serious relationships, no romantic intentions, just the desire to have fun, casual hook-ups.
Are you a single woman who just wants to enjoy life, including regular sex? This post is a handy guide that will provide you a few useful steps to find sex via dating app.
- Choose the right app
- Create an appealing profile
- Take initiative
- Don’t be too picky
- Start foreplay online
- Maintain more than one contact
- Clearly indicate intentions and boundaries
- Suggest a neutral place for the hook-up
Ready to jump into the world of casual dating? Let’s hit it! First things first:
1. Choose the right app
According to our own statistics, we can estimate that around 10-15% of single adult women in New Zealand use, or have used in the past, a sex dating app. So there are definitely people out there – the only question is where to look.
First of all, as a woman, you'll probably have a much easier time than men when it comes to non-committal fun. This is simply because there are considerably more men on apps for sex dating, so you’ll have a larger selection to choose from.
However, in order for you to find an erotic adventure quickly and easily, make sure to be straight-up in advance. There are also black sheep among dating apps, and they should be avoided. Stick to the reputable providers, such as C-Date. First, take a look at comparisons and browse through relevant forums. BeNaughty or AdultFriendFinder are also reputable providers and a free basic membership gives you access to a lot of functions.
Before you jump into the fray, it is important to find a decent facilitator for your journey. Especially as a woman, you often need a thick skin on such apps. Inappropriate messages and nude pictures of men showing off their junk are par for the course. Read up on testimonials from former and current users to find the platforms where the tone is still mostly friendly, to begin with.
2. Create an appealing profile
After you have pinned your app of choice for sex dating, you still need an appealing profile. Here, you don't have to immediately show yourself in lingerie or erotic poses. On the contrary – leave some room for the men's imagination. Let them wonder what’s under that shirt. It’s actually much more important to have a welcoming and seductive smile when you present yourself to potential partners.
The advantage of this is that you can already sort them out. If you were to upload lingerie pictures, your inbox would probably burst at the seams in no time. If you upload normal pictures, however, you reduce the risk of being contacted by desperately horny men.
Small tip: Serious platforms place a lot of emphasis on discretion and allow members to make their photo galleries publicly unrecognizable. With this functionality, you yourself determine who can see the pictures. Nevertheless, don’t overdo it with nudity – a little restraint goes a long way.
Pictures alone are not enough, of course. Don’t neglect the rest of the profile design. Whether you’re checking boxes or writing a personal description, tell men more about yourself and specifically address the contacts who share your erotic interests. If you have certain preferences or fantasies, you can suggest them playfully in the profile description and arouse the curiosity of the male members. Take some time for a complete profile. It’ll help you narrow down your options from the beginning.
3. Take the initiative
Is it true only men have to make the first move?
Maybe that was the case a few years ago, but come on, we live in the 21st century now. As a woman, you're allowed to make the first move – and in fact, you should. Many men who sign up on sex dating apps have a lot on their mind, but don't dare approach women directly. They’re afraid of rejection and can’t even find the gumption to send the first message. And if they do, they’re awkward and don't know how to start the conversation.
So, if you find someone who appeals to you, go ahead and take the initiative yourself. Make the first move and show the gentlemen there’s nothing to be afraid of. By taking the initiative, you can also control who you want for a potential date from the get-go.
4. Don't be too picky
Sounds a bit strange at first, but it's actually an important point. You can't expect to find one Adonis after another when searching on sex dating apps. Take a peek beyond your usual go-tos. After all, you're not looking for the man of your dreams, just someone who can help you overcome a dry spell.
Looking outside the box opens up completely new possibilities for you to find a hook-up. You might even end up deviating from your usual and take a liking to men you didn't necessarily have on your radar otherwise. And guys who see a date like this as an opportunity will make a real effort to make a woman happy in the process.
Of course, this doesn't mean that you should sell yourself short. Just because your libido wants to take the reins, you don't have to give every man an opportunity to meet you.
5. Start foreplay online
See the search for sex via dating app as an exciting foreplay. Before it comes to an actual hook-up, you have the chat option. It's the perfect opportunity to get to know each other better and to start things off playfully. Use this option to find out more about your significant other and try your hand at sexting. A few raunchy messages and sizzling exchanges are worth their weight in gold to get ready for the date.
This is also the time to tell your potential sex partner a little bit more about yourself and your fantasies. In this way, you can gauge online whether the chemistry is right and whether this man really has something to offer you. If, on the other hand, you find that you are not on the same wavelength in the chat, you can break off the contact early on.
6. Maintain more than one contact
Keep in mind, you have no obligations at this point. Who says you can contact several men at the same time? As a woman, you will probably enjoy the full freedom of choice in this arena. You can enjoy this opportunity to the fullest. Don’t limit yourself to one contact.
The advantage of this is that you always have someone in reserve you can fall back on, if necessary. If man A cancels, man B will certainly be happy to step in – just keep it your little secret. Nobody needs to know how you got there.
Give each contact the feeling that they’re the only man you’re in contact with. This is a harmless white lie and ensures you keep your options open for no-strings fun.
7. Clearly indicate intentions and boundaries
Maybe you're not just looking for a one-time adventure, but a friendship, too. You should communicate such things clearly from the beginning, both what you want and what you emphatically don’t want. Men in particular tend to go a bit overboard online and give free rein to their wildest fantasies. Is this guy going on and on about things that are completely out of the question for you? Then be open and honest – tell him you have clear limits that must be observed.
After all, the goal here is a hook-up where both parties feel comfortable and that only works if everyone can maintain their boundaries. On the other hand, don’t close yourself off to new experiences too early. Be open to things that may enrich your sex life. You alone decide how far you want to go with sex via dating app
8. Suggest a neutral place for the hook-up
The last step is to arrange your in-person date. No man will hold it against you if you suggest a meeting place in public. This serves your own protection and on the other hand, it allows you to get a feel for your counterpart in real life before things get steamy.
Ideal places to start include cafes or bars where you’ll be surrounded by other people. Again, this gives you the chance to gauge the chemistry between you and see if the evening is really headed for the sheets. Make sure to point out before the date that meeting in-person does not guarantee sex. A nice side effect is that your potential partner will probably do his best to impress you so you both get what you want.
In conclusion
Believe it or not, when it comes to sex via dating app, you as a woman are in the driver’s seat, if only because men usually have a harder time finding a woman for no-strings-attached fun. Just don't let inappropriate messages or unwanted pictures scare you off from the whole process. Not every man realizes that dick pics and strong come-ons are not exactly the key to success. It’s best to ignore such messages and focus on the men who really catch your eye. And don't worry, because even as a woman you can start contacting them – dare to make the first move. In casual dating, women are definitely the stronger sex and you should take advantage of that.