Why some men just can't find a woman

Are you single and have the feeling that love is not working out for you? No need to worry, because you are definitely not an isolated case. According to current statistics, there were around 1 million singles in New Zealand at last count. Yet the gender ratio was balanced, with just 49.3 percent of the singles being male.

So, you're not alone!

But why is it that some men simply can't find a woman?

Are they not making any effort or are they perhaps too reserved? After all, the statistics show that there are just as many single women as men. So, everyone should be able to find someone to their liking. So, why could it be that many men have a lot to offer, but apparently no one wants it?

Flirt experts and dating coaches pop up like sprouts and guarantee quick success with women. But do these people really have a magic formula for love happiness?

From their perspective, the wrong mindset of men is often one of the reasons why they don't end up with women. Negative thoughts like "What can I offer a partner" or "They all just want bad boys or guys with cash" seem to be responsible for the fact that it doesn't work.

But is that really true?

Do women only go for big wallets and guys who can protect them with their bare hands should a zombie apocalypse occur? If so, then why do normal men also have harmonious relationships?

We wanted answers, which is why we came up with a few points to help shed some light on the issue. So:

Ready to find out why it might not work for you as well and how you can change things?

What do women really like

But what is the secret of men who have a happy relationship? What made them convince the lady they like and win her over? The fact is that it is a unique story. However, there are things that women fundamentally like and that are a good prerequisite for getting to know a potential partner.

In short, this is what women like:

Honesty is a must
Men who show serious interest
Reliability
Men who make them laugh

At first glance, it looks like a long list. However, these are basically points that men also want from women.

Honesty is a must

Nobody wants to be deceived. This, however, includes even small fibs when getting to know each other. Women want to get to know men who are sincere and with whom they can build trust. But honesty also means opening up as a man and telling the woman what's on your mind. Forget the image of a man being mysterious and therefore attractive. Everyone has a vulnerable and sensitive side - and showing it openly and honestly is more attractive than you think. That doesn't mean you should keep lamenting non-stop.

Men who show serious interest

Speaking of honesty, you should be open about that, too. You are interested in getting to know a woman. What's wrong with showing it to her and asking her questions. Many men don't pay enough attention to their counterpart when getting to know her and think they have to make their mark first. Instead of focusing on the woman, they try to score points and seduce her with their posturing. Women like men who show them that they really want to get to know them.

Online dating as an example:

You register on a dating site and come across a profile that interests you. Most men prove at that moment how uncreative they are and ruin their chances with the first message. How? By writing irrelevant messages that read like copy & paste. A "Hey, how are you?" could be sent to tens of other women at the same time.

How can you do it better?

Show your interest in this woman as soon as you contact her. Take a close look at the profile and use the available information for the first message. Start with a "Hey XY, I saw on your profile that you're into climbing. What was the highest wall you have climbed so far?" it becomes directly clear that you have read her profile with interest.

And such messages are what women like when making contact.

Reliability

Women who are looking for a serious relationship are looking for a reliable man. They want someone they can count on and trust. After all, this is supposed to be the partner with whom they may even plan to start a family. That doesn't mean you have to become the alpha animal in the relationship. But having both feet on the ground and handling things properly is the least you can do here. A relationship is like the co-op mode in a video game, because it is only together that you can achieve your goals. And you have to be able to rely on each other.

Men who make them laugh

Laughing is healthy, makes us forget the dull everyday life and increases our happiness hormones. No wonder women like it when a man makes them laugh. Here, of course, you should keep in mind that humor varies. That's why it is even more important to be on the same page on this point. Laughing together strengthens the bond and is a sign that both of you are comfortable with each other.

Okay, and…

What do women find annoying about men?

Alright, women want men who make them laugh, are honest and also show true interest. But are there things that really piss women off and are considered to be absolutely annoying?

Maybe you, just like many other men, think that women are only into assholes. If so, you might feel a little better in a few minutes, because here are the things that women find particularly annoying:

Stupid macho behavior
Pushy behavior
Talking about the ex
Narcissistic behavior

And you ought to know that asshole guys aren't as high on the list as you might think. Of course, there may be women who go for guys like that. But most can do without the hooligan who doesn't know how to behave. And that includes...

Stupid macho behavior

Men who treat others down and act like a king are anything but sexy. Women pay a lot of attention to how their potential partner behaves towards others. Treating the waiter or the cashier in a derogatory way can backfire very quickly.

As well as...

Pushy behavior

And no, this doesn't just refer to a date where you're trying to put your arm around her the whole time. The terms "nudes" and "dickpic" have been popping up more and more recently. "Dickpics", as the name suggests, are pictures of male genitalia. "Nudes," on the other hand, are naked pictures of women.

And now guess what many men take for granted when getting to know each other. Sending women the most beautiful pictures of their bodies and asking for nude pictures in return. Not exactly a testament to manners and a point that women find not only annoying, but disgusting.

Bitching about the ex

Yes, the woman broke your heart back then and may have fallen into bed with someone else. But that's not a reason to go on and on hating her. At that point, the woman is only asking herself two questions, "Is he secretly still hung up on her?" and "Okay, so that's how he will be talking about me if it doesn't work out!"

You probably don't want to hear the ex-boyfriend's name at every conceivable opportunity either, do you?

Narcissistic behavior

So, the whole world revolves around you? And then how is there going to be room for a woman by your side? Men who constantly talk only about themselves and what a catch they are tend to have the opposite effect. Why should a woman get involved with someone who only has eyes for himself? Wanting to be seen in a good way is certainly not wrong. If so, please do so in a modest way and not in such a way that the woman is completely forgotten.

What do women find irresistible in men?

Okay, now we know what women like and what sucks. But are there also things that catapult you straight into the heart of a woman? You probably immediately think of physical features like broad shoulders, a masculine chin or the classic six-pack. A pretty package is naturally appealing and has an attractive effect. But is this all that women find irresistible in a man?

No, because you can also become a true charmer with your personality and conquer the heart of a lady. What are the qualities that make you irresistible?

Self-confidence
Intelligence
A sense of humor
Being a sincere and good listener

Self-confidence

Are you someone who lacks self-confidence and doesn't think you are good enough for anything? Watch out, because that's exactly the image you radiate, and it's anything but attractive. Charisma is much more important than appearance. Work on your self-image and learn to appreciate and love yourself. Women are attracted to men who are self-confident, have an opinion and stand by it.

Intelligence

You don't have to memorize the encyclopedia or read the news non-stop. But women like it when they can talk about profound topics with their partner. This includes emotional intelligence, which especially includes empathy. Something you can work on. Instead of always watching sports, you might just want to pick up a book.

Humor

Laughter can move hearts. That's why humor is a trait that becomes especially attractive, and one that many women want in their potential partner. If you can make a woman laugh, it's worth more than being able to carry her half a kilometer with your strong arms.

Being a sincere and good listener

Might sound boring at first, but it is a quality that is in high demand. When a man not only listens to a woman, but also responds to what she has to say, it shows that he is an active listener. This in turn proves that you are interested in your counterpart and this trait is worth its weight in gold.

And why doesn't it work for me with women?

Why doesn't it work with you, even though you have most of these qualities? There can be different reasons for this as well, because expectations and mindset are also crucial to meeting the right women. Here are a few possibilities why it is difficult for you to meet a woman:

You have the wrong demands and expectations
You do not seem confident enough
You don't make the first step because you misinterpret or don't interpret signals

You have the wrong demands and expectations

You have cobbled together a picture of the perfect partner in your head and want to have exactly that. As a result, you develop a blinkered view and perhaps focus on a fictitious person that will never exist. Think about your demands and consider which points you can cut back on. Does it really have to be a woman with green eyes and blond hair who likes to play tennis in her free time?

You do not seem confident enough

You think you're the average guy who can be found on every corner. That's why you don't think you're special and you project that. This makes you look insecure and not like a man who is at peace with himself. Get to know yourself and your strengths better, go into self-reflection and find out why you are a good match.

You don't make the first move because you misinterpret or don't interpret signals.

When a woman smiles at you, do you wonder if you have something in your teeth? Or you're too shy to approach her at that moment? Even nowadays, women like it when the man makes the first active move. They, on the other hand, flirt with their eyes, maintain eye contact and show that they find you attractive. If a woman smiles at you and looks into your eyes longer, you should dare and approach her. Even a rejection is an experience and progress. After all, you have dared.

Where and how do I find a woman who suits me?

Let's move on to the final question: Where do you meet women who suit you? The easiest way to meet someone these days is through online dating. Signing up on a dating site or dating app has several advantages that cannot be denied.

One of them is that you already have a rough impression of the person on the other side before you make contact. The prerequisite is, of course, that their profile has been filled out carefully and thus provides you with useful information. But even otherwise it is the most convenient way to find women from your area. Contacts that you would perhaps never meet in everyday life, but match like a glove, could also be on the quest.

The day-to-day search is even harder, because you never really know if your partner will be around the corner the next moment. The fear of being rejected in public also prevents many people from approaching women on the street. That is why we advise you to find a serious dating platform, create an attractive online profile and then follow the points we have summarized in this article.